Wear your hat backwards

4. Wear your hat backwards

Listen, you guys are young so this will totally work for you...right now.

 

Be cool or hot, whatever they are calling it these days. Just enjoy it because when you are a older it will be time to turn it around and be a man. 

 

If you don't flip the bill it can make for some awkward moments. Seriously, these guys are talented and successful men. I really do respect them. Really. But the hat? Come on.

Even if you become president keep it forward. The title of most powerful man in the world does not give you the freedom to wear the hat as you please. Just keep it FORWARD, Mr. President.

ex

I know of only two  exceptions to this rule.

Exception #1 : You are Ken Griffey Jr.

 

(you are not him, so don't do it)

(as awesome as he looks, again you are not him, so don't do it)

Exception #2 : If you are in an umpire dispute you have my permission to turn your hat around.  

You are not a grown man now so rock that backwards hat like you're the Fresh Prince himself!

Super Hero Narrator

It seems like every day Max wants to be a different super hero. He throws on his Superman, Spiderman, or Batman costumes/pj's and can change his identity in a moment.

As the family super hero guru he his is also the Super Hero Narrator; he has the responsibility to assign everybody in the family their role in the epic family adventure narrative we are all characters in.

I was batman for awhile. I really liked being Batman because I drive a 2005 Black Grand Prix and I called it my Batmobile. I just imagined a swarm of bats flying behind me squeeling down 71 on my way to work.

Mama was Ironman despite failed attempts to convince Max that she would be a better Black Widow or Catwomen...this is his dream world not mine :)

Deacon was Captain America.  Clearly a good choice.

Jordan got a sweet 2013 Black VW Beetle. Consequently, Max realized Bruce Wayne (Jordan) has more money than papa and promoted Jordan to be Batman. That was fine. Whatever.

I was not thrilled about this because I loved my role.

Then I was given my new assignment.

A strength unmatched was beginning to rise from within me. I could feel the power from my toes to my head.

"Papa, you can be Hulk!"

Yes! This was great new. I would absolutely love being Hulk. He is so strong and can blame temper tantrums on his issues. I get to be green which is pretty sweet too.

As Super Hero Narrator your choices are important and effect the outworking of all super hero activities. If the maximum level of fun is going to be achieved you need to take this role seriously.

It was a smart move by Max to make me Hulk.  
He knew as a result of this move I would be uncontrollable.
I would let my emotions get to me.
I would go over the top with my character and as a result maximum fun level would be reached almost every time.

I would throw the boys around and wrestle them to the ground until they were a pulp. Max would laugh until he cried because I would not be able to be stopped from tickling him. I could throw max from a height of 4 feet, through the air horizontally 10-12 feet in the TBBP

Well played Max.

By the way, Max, the other day when you were saying that you were Hulk because you had a green shirt on...you were just kidding right?

Storytime

2. There is always time for a story


OBD : Is the premeditated sequence of manipulative requests that a child (typically around the age of 2) will attempt to engage in with the parent, with the hope that the inevitable laying down of said child is postponed.

Max perfected operation bedtime delay (OBD) at an early age. I am sure the others will learn from him as well. He was so cute in his attempts we always caved in. I knew he was tricking me and I just could not say no. Literally, I would stay there and say to myself, "Sucker". He knew too because as he was going pee for the 2nd time in 3 minutes he would look over and just smirk.

Tactics of OBD

• "I have to go potty"
• seriously, how do you say no to that?
• "I need a drink"
• even though you know this will lead to the first tactic, you cave. 
• "I need to my "doggy" (insert bear, dolly, whatever). 
• Max hides his so he pretends that it is lost and can use this about 20 minutes after laying down.
• "My pj's are scratchy"
• You are just mean if your kid is scratchy all night. 
• When I was a kid we sang a song and prayed every night.
• If you kid asks you to do this good luck saying no. You can't.

There are hundreds of these devious deceptions so be warned young parent. If you are a grandparent do not attempt to dodge these. You will never be able to overcome their power.

There is one that I find incredibly difficult to say no to...in fact I think there is always time for this one. If Max says tell me a story I always (99%) cave.

• "Tell me a story papa!"
• If they add "bible" in front of story consider it over. I can't say no to this. Ever.

This is incredibly hard for me to say no to because, stories will teach your children more about life than any form of teaching. There is something about stories that grips our hearts and minds like no other teaching mechanism. Add this to going straight to bed to lay in bed and think about this story and you have an incredible oppurtunity.

Some of our favorites right now:

TJSB is for ages 4 and up but it has the most incredible art and the best written children's bible out there.

 

"You will always be my buddy"

1. You will always be my buddy. No matter what.

The other night I heard screaming coming from "The Big Ball Pit".

Oh wait, you do not know what this is? 

Let me introduce you then.

Sir or madam, this is "The Big Ball Pit"

Parent tip : As a parent, when given the chance, always say yes to purchasing The Big Ball Pit.

TBBP makes for an easy night of entertainment when mom or dad is out for the night with friends!

I heard screaming because somehow TBBP had been the defenseless victim of a 15 month old's ravaging attack. That theory was according to the eyes in the room, the big brother, Max. Upon further review it may have been caused by somebody a wee bigger in size (albeit not much bigger) who climbed over the wall into the pit instead of going through the access door provided.

Like any good dad I got some tape and went to work to patch up the little hole. As I was working Max being very intrigued climbed on me to take a closer look. I snapped and yelled "Get off me Max". He really only wanted to help because he is super curious about how things get fixed.He looked so shocked because he was not trying to do anything wrong. I was crushed just by look in his eyes.

He stormed off tears the size of lemon drops rolling down his cheek and as he went he turned, looked at me, and yelled "I'M NOT PLAYING AND I'M NOT YOUR BUDDY!" 

My first thought was "Holy Crap that is definitely my son!" 

(I'm sure my parents are reading this right now and laughing at how the tables have turned :))

My second thought was, "Wow, I failed that one. Big time."

My third thought was, "We can make good out of this still" 

I told Max that I should not have yelled at him. I told him I was sorry because I knew he just wanted to help. I then told him that no matter how mad he was at me he would always be my buddy.

Nothing would ever make him not be my buddy. Nothing I do. Nothing he does or any of my boys for that matter. No strings attached. No Conditions. We will always be buddies.

 *   *   *

In relationships I hope to show my boys that the best, longest lasting, and important relationships are those that are not based any kind of stipulations. The kind of relationships that say "you bring this to a relationship and I bring that" are just hard, frustrating and rarely enjoyable. You have to always worry about messing up and the person is always trying to please you.On the other hand when you know the other person accepts you, as their buddy, no matter what you do or don't bring to the relationship you are free to just enjoy them and they you. You are free to share life, care for each other and attempt to go to incredible places with that person because you know failure does not end the relationship. If anything it will make it stronger.

An Introduction

I am blessed beyond measure to be the Papa of some incredible boys. Being a father is one of the hardest and heaviest responsibilities I have ever taken on in my life. That being said, it must be proclaimed that I love being their dad.

I love wrestling matches and playing with trucks. I love painting pictures and singing silly songs. I love trying to figure out their personalities and how to love them best.

It is my hope that through this series of posts I will be able to teach, encourage, and challenge my boys to become men of character.  I want to leave them these posts so they have a way to hear my voice when I am not with them. I want to always be teaching them what it means to be a boy now a man later.
 
Some of the topics that I will cover will be as varied as topics under the sun. Sports, Business, Faith, Relationships, how to catch bullfrogs. Anything my boys will need advice on I hope to have for them here. This may give you a taste of the topics I will speak to:


As Boys,
I want them to have fun
I want them to learn the value of every human
I want them to respect, obey and cherish their Mama.
I want them to learn the value of giving
I want them to be learners

As men,
I want them to use their time wisely.
I want them to be work hard.
I want them to manage their wealth and possessions well.
I want them to treat women with great honor and dignity.
I want them to love Jesus above anything else.

I hope that among the plethora of topics I write about you find something that is helpful. I hope that you can share the advice with your son (whether you are a mom or a dad). This in the end is about me thinking through the needs of my boys and how to help them grow as individuals. Like my boys, your children have needs specific to who they are. I hope this series encourages you to take time to really learn and study your children and be engaged in teaching them.